I continue to think about this subject. Unforgiveness is one of the major hindrances that can hinder your healing. Listen to what Jesus says in Mark 11:25-26. "And whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him and [let it drop](leave it, let it go), in order that your Father who is in heaven may also forgive you your [own] failings and shortcomings and let them drop. But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father in heaven forgive your failings and shortcomings." Happy New Year 2011, I still think this an important message! A quote by Author: Tami Hoag 2007... What purpose does it serve to hold that anger? What good does it do? Hatred is like taking poison and expecting the other person to die of it."

An Opinion... Isn't it amazing that almost everyone has an opinion to offer about the bible (as well as other subjects), and yet so few have studied it (or the subject)? R. C. Sproul, If only one would read before speaking, they would not look so foolish. Yet, I don't want to get in anyone's face... so I keep dropping hints. Does it help? I hope so...)

Monday, November 15, 2010

Some news today, and yet I still wait for a definate diagnosis!

My mind is still collecting itself from my trip to the doctor today.  Is it natural to leave the doctor office with your thoughts whirling around in your head?  Okay, let's back up... I went into the doctor office with my sister and waited, waited, and waited for the doctor to come into the room.  I turned to Gloria and said, "You will probably have to visit me in the hospital later today.  I will be the one heavily medicated, so that I will not go ballistic, when the doctor finally gets into this room and tells me that my results are not in."  After a few more minutes both she and I were nervously laughing, thinking "no way" would that happen again. 

The doctor came in... keep in mind this is the doctor who is really trying to get things in motion for me.   I really don't want to be rude to him, so I keep telling myself to be patient.  Yes, I am still a work in progress regarding patience.

After reviewing news he has already given me, the doctor says he is still waiting for the pathology report on my genetic testing.  It should be in by the end of the week.  Did I hear that right?  Then to put a positive spin on the visit, he again theorized that once he knows exactly what type of B Cell Lymphoma I have, he can plan the proper Chemo treatment.  Most likely it will be one of three or four cancers he is considering.  If the report comes back as he thinks, the treatment will probably be Chemo once every three weeks, for a total of six treatments.  The day after each Chemo treatment I will be going in for a shot, this is to help keep my white cell count up.

After returning home today, I started reading on about this shot for my WBC (white blood cell count).  Even though it wasn't great news, I am one who wants to know what is going on.  Going in mentally prepared helps me. 

I am now waiting for a call confirming an appointment for later this week to install a port ( or portacath).   On Tuesday, 11/23 I have to go in for a port blood draw and see the doctor.  At that time I am supposed to find out my Chemo schedule, which is supposed to begin right after Thanksgiving.

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia:  A port (or portacath) is a small medical applicance that is installed beneath the skin.  A catheter connects the port to a vein.  Under the skin, the port has a septum through which drugs can be injected and blood samples can be drawn many times, usually with less discomfort for the patient than a more typical "needle stick"...  ...The port is usually inserted in the upper chest, just below the clavicle or collar bone, leaving the patient's hands free.

Images from 
My brother-in-law says that having a port is really helpful for him.  Less pokes for me is always a nice thing.  He also told me there is a trick to breathing in and out when poking the needle into the port.  If he does it right, no pain is felt.  Yes, I am for that!

Tonight I am thinking how blessed I am.  This news of cancer could be so much worse than it is.  Yes, I will always have it; have to watch over it; do treatments for it; take medication; feel side effects; but, I will learn to live with it and the emotional baggage it carries.  Did you note that word live?

I point blank asked the doctor today what I was looking at in longetivity.  He, of course can't give me exacts, but said with low grade lymphoma worst case five years.  Or... ten+ years!  I am looking at the ten plus years for me.  I will need that much time to finish all of my quilting projects I have begun!

Jeremiah 29:11
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."  NIV


  1. Oh, Marie. You are amazing. What can I say?! Nothing! Except that I uttter daily prayers on your behalf and will not stop! I am inspired by your strength and courage and yes, even patience :) throughout this arduous process! You are a precious daughter of the King! Never forget that! You wear the crown well. We are all works in progress...some days are more progressive than others! :0 Bless you my friend!
    Bless You! Love, Lorraine

  2. Thanks for your comments Marie. And thank you so much for sharing that link! I watched it and had goosebumps! God bless little Cody and God bless our troops!
    By the way, I thought you might find this blog a blessing (it belongs to Stacy who is fighting breast cancer)she is a tower of strength and I am always touched by her posts.
    I hope you'll enjoy it also! Sending you a big hug! Lorraine

  3. Marie, your life is a testimony of how HIS PEACE transcends even in the most life changing circumstances, and it continues to impact everyone around you - I am thanking GOD for you right this very moment - you are an inspiration and He is faithful to complete the work He started in you - prayers continue to cover jaime

    "no eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love Him. 1 Corinthians 2:9