Today...

  

Ms. Droopy



Haven't been sleeping well.  It seems my brain doesn't want to shut down.  During the day I can keep busy, which occupies my brain.  But, at night when all is quiet, I can't stop the endless thinking. Called my primary doctor, as he has prescribed all of my other medications, and asked if there was something else I could take to help me mentally shut down for a while.  Sometimes I do not react to medicines like the normal person does. He prescribed me Lorazapam... has it helped me yet?  No.  It is like when I have been prescribed Vicodin, don't even get tired... while my sister is in slumberland while on Vicodin.  So, during the night I read so that my thoughts are on the last passages. If that doesn't work, I have turned the TV on to something I will not get interested in, of course that often backfires.  And that's bad when I have it turned onto a pre-teen program.  Get up walk around, snack (which is a no no, both for eating at that time and allowing myself to become totally alert) and go back to bed with clear thoughts.  Each of these work some of the time, but not all of the time.  Finally, I get out my pen and paper and write endless "to do" lists.  Just too much information given to me these past weeks to not allow my brain to be passive. Until I know what type of cancer I have, I can't even begin to think of more research on type, treatments, cure rates, etc.  So, another thing I have to wait on until after waiting for the biopsy, and then the wait for my appointment to the urologist so that he can give me the results of the biopsy.  Wait, anticipate, expect, action in abeyance... no matter how you sugar coat it, the time is stressful.  Yes, I am working on my new virture... patience.  It just isn't showing yet.  (ha ha)        

I am researching better insurance coverage.  Since I am in a contract, I can't even speak to an agent until the window during October and part of November.  Then, the new coverage will not take effect until my current contract runs out, December 31st at midnight.  When I took out the plan I have, it was not clear to me the real difference between a Medicare Advantage Plan and a Medicare Supplement Plan.  Studying these, and the premiums, co-pays, deductibles, taking into consideration my pre-existing conditions... to say the least it is a lot of research and timing to contemplate.  If one is in my position, I cannot stress enough that keeping on top of this type issue is important!  Become familiar with the employees in the billing/finance department of your doctor(s) and hospital.  Keeping in contact with them will help reduse a lot of heartache later. 

Soon to come...  Ms. Droopy no more!
I'm working on it...